We were making faces for selfies and faces at each other.
As I looked at her to make a face, she suddenly stopped and stared.
“You’re eyes are so big. So, so big.”
I laughed and then continued to make a new silly face. Her eyes became serious, and she came in closer, “No. Your eyes are very big. Very big.”
And then she poked them.
We had an epic Flour & Flowers day on Friday. So epic, in fact, I was up before 5am, and met the ladies at 5:30am to begin. And because it was such a full week of orders, I helped them pretty consistently through the day to help with details and be an extra set of hands.
Our two ovens were on constantly from 6am to 4pm.
We used about 30 kilograms of flour.
We made 35 loaves of bread.
Nyein Nyein rolled out 170 tortillas, because that’s her specialty.
We made 30 pans of cinnamon rolls.
We delivered to 33 customers around town.
Nyein Nyein & Pyint Pyu Hey had to finish baking while Pyo Pyo and I showered and headed off to make deliveries. We came back to pick up the rest mid-way through. For Pyo Pyo and I, we finished deliveries and finances about 6:45pm.
It was such long day, but also so very good. They were optimistic about the sales, and they made quite a bit of extra money to reward them for their early morning and late day. They also put a large portion into their savings account for the end of the year, which is exciting! To be able to reward them both the day of and in the future seems like a win!
We also had good conversations and laughter. There are great things about having a tiny little kitchen filled with four people (five during The Breakfast Club hours!) to run into each other and step over each other and laugh together.
There were so many good things about the day.
__________________
At one point the conversation turned to our husbands. They commented that Stephen & I don’t fight; ironically, we had just had quite the argument the previous morning, during The Breakfast Club, which I was sure at least some of them had heard or been aware of. But the conversation, loosely translated, when like this:
You and Stephen never fight.
We do fight sometimes.
But we don’t hear it. When my husband and I fight everyone can hear it and everyone knows!
Well, we fight, but you might not hear it. And Stephen doesn’t hit me.
Because in America men don’t hit their wives, right?
Well, in America, men can be arrested for hitting their wives. But also, Christians mostly don’t hit their wives, because of what the Bible says. Stephen doesn’t hit me because he loves God and doesn’t think that is okay.
Yeah, Stephen doesn’t like it when men hit women. He really doesn’t like that. And he loves you. You love each other.
Yes, and because he loves me. We do love each other. And yes, Stephen doesn’t like men hitting their wives or other women.
He always comes out and stops them! So I’m not worried when you are here. I can come here or Stephen will come stop my husband.
Do your husbands hit you?
– One time. He hit me one time. Our son didn’t like it and said, ‘Don’t do that! Don’t hurt mommy! She doesn’t like it!’
– Sometimes. Have you ever seen the marks on me? It hasn’t happened for a long time. The worst time was when you were in America. I had marks all over me; my face, my arms, my legs. He was really mad and hit me a lot. Until his brother came to pull him off me and told him to stop. But everyone heard and saw it.
You weren’t here so I didn’t know what to do. But I don’t worry if you are here, I know Stephen will come! My husband is so much bigger than me, there isn’t anything I can do. But Stephen will come.
Was he drunk when he hit you?
Yeah. He drank to much and came home; I hadn’t finished the rice yet and he was really angry. My daughter was so scared and kept shouting, “Daddy, don’t do that! Mommy is hurt! Daddy, DON’T!” But it hasn’t happened for a long time now.
I was processing all this, and that was obvious. I love these women, and their kids, and their husbands. And honestly, in this context, they are pretty healthy families, all things considered. My mind was swimming: the father of that little girl? They actually have a really sweet, beautiful relationship. The brother that pulled the husband off? He’s a Reinforcer. He’s in high school.
It’s true, Stephen will come if he can.
It’s true, he doesn’t like men hitting women; husbands hitting their wives. And in his words, “If that’s what they remember me by–the crazy American who didn’t like men hitting their wives–I’m okay with that!”
The ladies were watching me, and asked, It makes you sad, doesn’t it?
Yeah, it makes me really sad.
Sometimes there is so much we want to change in this neighborhood. I want them to have more education and more opportunities: to learn English and to learn how to use computers; to learn guitar and Thai and literacy. I want them to have a job where they manage the books and count the money; where they learn more reading and writing Burmese and doing math; where they learn to manage their time and do their best: so we sell bread and flowers every week to do that. We make jewelry and sew bags.
I want the kids to love books and play safely. I want the kids to go to school, not to work or be sent off to who-knows-where. I want them to learn to save money. I want them to eat healthy and have enough to eat. I want them to go to the doctor and receive treatment. I want their babies to be born with paperwork. I want them to have access to safe, clean water. I want them to have a safe place to ask for help when it floods or they lose their jobs or someone gets really sick.
I want them to see their value. I want them to have confidence. I want them to know how much God loves them–so much that he sent this young married couple halfway around the world, to this seemingly random street, to fall in love with this neighborhood. To struggle miserably at language, but keep on trying. To struggle miserably with learning to love here, but to keep on trying. I want them to see that God really, really loves them, and he can show them mansions of his goodness that I haven’t figured out yet, but I believe is there. And I believe it’s good.
But yes, I also want them to learn that husbands hitting their wives isn’t a normal, and that its okay to expect something else. I want them to see how to stick up for each other. I want them feel loved when someone else does stick up for them.
There are so many things we want to change; and it feels overwhelming.
But I have committed: “I will listen for the echo of rejoicing in heaven when those I minister among step into the light or even take a small step forward, and will remind myself that persistent celebration rolls back the power of the enemy.”
And somewhere, in that sad conversation, there was an echo of rejoicing.
__________________
It was just hours before this conversation became more real. We were about to leave for dinner, but instead, the evening found us outside standing next to these same ladies, while we all tried to determine if another woman in the community was safe. It was a fight; a loud argument. But it has turned violent before, so we waited; prayerfully and carefully trying to determine when it’s preventing violence and when it’s prying.
Stephen went over to ask if everything was alright, and the mother said she was okay.
As we waited not too far away, her little boy came over within ten minutes, “My mom said to come call you now. She said to go call Stephen.”
So Stephen went to get the mother; and I went inside with the little boy. He had tears in his eyes as I sat to talk with him.
He and Stephen played MarioKart and Donkey Kong; and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles–which took so long to understand: The men, different colors, with the knives, cutting down…grass? What? Oh, turtles? No, frogs? With knives? What?”
I sat with the mother while she cried and calmed down. She told me she didn’t want her baby–the one arriving in just a month or two; and didn’t know how to take care of her kids. Would we take them?
Oh, the painful irony, folks: of being in a slower adoption process than we hoped, while being offered children–A little boy you already love and know! Newborn babies about to arrive across your street!–and know they are paperless; knowing the line between trafficking and adoption is so grey here; knowing that she needs to be equipped to care for her kids, not have them taken away. So we talked about this little baby that she would soon love so much. That she would look into his eyes and love him. How her son needs his mother and they love each other so much. They can stick together. He’s going to be such a great young man someday…
We talked about options, too: how we can help, how we can get outside help. How this isn’t the end of the story.
But as the story continues, it is not lost on me, as Stephen played video games with a little boy over a bowl of Mama noodles in front of the prayer painted on our wall:
May God bless us with discomfort
At easy answers, half-truths, and superficial relationships
So that we may live from deep within our hearts.
May God bless us with anger
At injustice, oppression, and exploitation of God’s creations
So that we may work for justice, freedom, and peace.
May God bless us with tears
To shed for those who suffer pain, rejection, hunger, and war,
So that we may reach out our hands to comfort them and
To turn their pain into joy.
And may God bless us with just enough foolishness
To believe that we can make a difference in the world,
So that we can do what others claim cannot be done:
To bring justice and kindness to all our children and all our neighbors who are poor.
__________________
I have been thinking more recently that this blog is on it’s way out; because who would want to read this? I’m sure there are rules out there about how many words I’m supposed to write; and this has to be way over that! It’s quite sad, and I know it. You might even think I need to pursue more counseling (than I already am!).
Can I just tell you: there are so many good things in our lives. I love how many jobs are created in our home; that women able to work safely and be paid fairly with their kids nearby. I love that they are given opportunities for more education in a variety of ways. I love that the youth have a safe place to be and learn. I love that the kids know we won’t hit them. I love that the parents know Stephen doesn’t hit me. I love that the littles come calling for Auntie Kelli and Uncle Stephen; and they’ll always find a hug, a smile, and safety. I love that we are in the neighborhood and culture; but also bringing in a new perspective. I love that we have so much to learn and so much to teach. I love that the kids teach pretend school on our porch; I love that they no longer dig through our trash. I love hearing English songs sung on our porch, whether the words are right or not. I love seeing the kids bring books to Thida to be read to. I love that the kids know to say thank you at our house, while the parents are amazed. I love that I can see kids on their way to school in the morning, put bandages on their cuts, and send them out the door after a steaming bowl of rice, vegetables, and meat.
I cannot believe what God has allowed to happen here. I cannot believe that he has been so gracious to us; for something so much bigger than a couple that didn’t know what they were getting into.
But while the goodness continues, every single day, I feel like I must also write about the sadness, because it’s true. It’s real, around the world, including this seemingly random street; and yours, too. It’s in your country of residence just as much as mine.
I recently read in Jim Wallis’ America’s Original Sin book, “Are we hiding behind untruths that help make us feel more comfortable, or are we willing to seek the truth, even if that is uncomfortable? [John 8:32] is telling us that only by seeking the truth are we made free, and that hanging on to untruths can keep us captive to comfortable illusions.”
All the conversations yesterday, the fighting: it made me uncomfortable. Honestly, even the 5am wake up and endless baking made me fairly uncomfortable! But I also encountered truth. And for this little neighborhood, the truth is that God both hurts for them and loves them more than we ever will. And that this is precisely why we’re here: to let the truth set us all free.
Sometimes dreams take a long time in coming.
Years ago Stephen wanted to work toward unifying the multilingual Church that surrounds us. There are so many different languages and backgrounds, but he wanted to have worship songs available in different languages in a way that it would be easy for everyone to sing together in the language of their choice. Ultimately, he hopes to have resources like this available to churches around this region, including recordings in difficult languages, translated chord charts, and more.
To start, it was a worship night, that has taken on different looks in different seasons of our life and of the Mae Sot community.
This month, Stephen worked really hard to gather together young leaders from the Karen, Burmese, and Thai community around us. They worked together to gather what songs are already translated and have the information available. They practiced to sing together, with different verses being led in different languages.
We also partnered with multiple para-church organizations in town to have a big enough space in the rain and to have a full band. It was a group effort to say the least, and that made it more amazing to see it happen last night.
Fifty or sixty people came, from different countries, backgrounds, statuses and ages. We all sang together in four languages.
It was beyond beautiful, and a really lovely step into this dream.
The Reinforcers were both scheduled to run sound, but only one was able to come due to a family situation. Because of the system Stephen chose for them, The Reinforcers are able to run it all from an iPad, which allowed him to sit in the audience with friends and sing along while he ran sound for the whole event. And while I don’t really know how to describe it to you–because you have to know him, to know his story, to know how much we pray for him and love him–but to see him using a new skill confidently among his peers, while singing along in Burmese and English; to see him really enjoying himself at a “church event”–it was a great opportunity. Sometimes church here can be very structured, for lack of a better word, and we want so badly to show this community how loving Jesus can be fun and natural and a part of your life; not just a boring sermon on Sunday.
We also had three teenage girls from the community join, able to sing alongside Christians from their school and in their own language, right alongside us.
It was a culmination of a lot of good things, and we are just celebrating that we got to be a part of it!
We started something new. Again!
It’s practically a disease, but with great results 😃
While we have loads of toys and games, there is a point where the kids get uninterested in trains and CandyLand. And when these kids get into teenage years, that’s really when we most want to be there for them. We want to provide them with one-on-one attention and opportunities to talk to us. We also want to give them skills, a chance to be set apart. It’s hard to instill the idea of dreaming, of opportunities, in migrant students, but we want to try.
Toward the end of last year, Stephen had an idea of how we could continue to reach this group of teenagers and youth in the community.
It also provided a way to use his gifts aptly: he loves technology and enjoys learning with it. So, we applied for a grant with Kingdom Mission Fund and we were granted it earlier this year! Per anything with just the two of us, it takes time for us to get things going. We’re generally operating a bit over our heads, if we haven’t mentioned that yet. But, it’s officially up and running!
Four days a week after school, while our house is also open for play, we have two iPads available to the older kids. We’ve chosen a select group we know well and want to further invest in. They have an hour per week that the iPads are reserved to them, for them to learn different skills through apps and lessons with Stephen and I.
We gave them options of what to learn: English, coding, math, guitar, cajon, and art. They almost all chose guitar initially. Some have since changed their minds, but we do have six students studying guitar for an hour per week. We also have three learning English, one on coding, and another on art.
We have set it up to be self-guided but with help and assistance from us. I help more with English and art; Stephen helps more with guitar and coding. They are also given the freedom to “study” their class for 40 minutes, and take the last 20 to play educational games or puzzles. This week I taught Mwei Mwei how to play solitaire, and she loved it. And honestly, it teaches some great deduction and problem-solving skills that aren’t utilized in schools here. We played together, and I had the most fun I’ve ever had playing Solitaire!
The oldest three kids are actually given two hours per week. Mwei Mwei is learning both guitar and math; one of The Reinforcers does English one day per week and guitar the following. The other Reinforcer is really loving coding, and he does that twice per week.
The two new iPads focused on the youth has opened up our older iPad for a younger group. We were also given an older iMac that Stephen has set up with some basic games and activities. All of them have different schedules to give different age groups opportunities to learn technology, strategy, creativity, and more. It’s been really fun to see the kids learning new skills and exploring new worlds their community hasn’t previously had access to.
We’ve been introducing the idea of a schedule: they are each given a time on the iPads each week, and it’s their responsibility to show up to attend. We were laughing at the irony of the first few weeks, as we’d be encouraging people inside to sit in front of a screen. We’d be puling them out of groups and pushing them into work by themselves.
One of our goals is that this creates an individual activity for them to work toward and succeed at. We don’t want friends helping or taking over; we want them to get an individualized, focused opportunity to both teach themselves and get one-on-one help from us.
It means that we are constantly saying, “This is a one-person activity.” Or, “Stop playing outside and come work on the iPad!”
The difference is striking between their lives here and so many kids’ lives in the States. They spend so many hours outside; they are constantly walking to school, to the showers, to do laundry, to the shop. Everything is communal, so that they are always with people and in groups. There are often three or four people crowded around the computer to play Minecraft together. Even our retro video games: there are usually 8-10 kids taking turns playing Mario Kart, standing up, jumping around. As the two folks working extremely hard to get them fed every morning, I just want to tell them, Sit down! Let those calories stay with you! I want to give them a ride everywhere and get them seated playing a game; I want them to experience doing something on their own successfully.
It’s meant that this is fairly counter-cultural, but I think a good balance. Couldn’t we all use learning from our differences?
Overall, we’re so excited for the opportunities this has opened up and how smoothly we’ve been able to provide this for the community teenagers. We’re also going to do a test run of some English learning with two adult mothers next week.
We want to send out a special thanks to Kingdom Mission Fund, who makes projects like this possible! So many ideas just take a spark to make them happen, and we’re excited to be able to partner so that this could spark!
There has been good, too; I don’t want to neglect that.
One of our lost girls is back from Burma. Most of the family is together, living back in Mae Sot. She’s boarding at our pastor’s house and attending school. We get to see her on Sundays, and that is a joy.
We saw one of Thida’s daughters off to study in Burma for a year. We sent her off with photos and all the love & encouragement we could muster. We love her to bits.
Sometimes we come home to things like this, to both horrify and humor us.
I started a toddler class with Mwei Mwei on Thursday mornings. The kids call it “school” and often come with little backpacks that are empty.
I teach them English for thirty minutes or so, and then Mwei Mwei teaches them some Burmese. We sing songs while Stephen plays the guitar. It has brought me so much laughter over the past few weeks, and I love it.
We started a new after school program for the older kids–the full story which requires another post–but it’s going really well. The kids are loving it, and it’s manageable for us, so we’re thankful.
This team found a basketball game on the computer they love (and they are learning about angles while they play!) He vocally cheers for himself when he makes a shot. 😍
We’re still celebrating birthdays, and that’s fun.
We took one of our sweet friends out to snacks and ice cream with a small group of her friends, and it really was a beautiful afternoon smack in the midst of some of the messes mentioned above. We laughed and loved it.
And we put birthday candles into chicken nuggets. 🤷🏼♀️
On the way, the birthday girl was laughing at Stephen & I, saying, “Kelli always says, ‘Uhhmm-hmm, uhhmm-hmm.’ Stephen always says, ‘Yep! Yep! Yep!'” Oh, they know us so well.
Sometimes, we make cakes and attempt to decorate them with jelly filling for little at-home parties. And we laugh and love those, too.
We have this little fellow who likes to be drawn on and a babysitter that enjoys it even more.
We have this little girl, who came to the door last week to tell us she was going to get a snack with her mom. To this I asked, “And when you mom gives you your snack, what are you going to tell her?”
“Thank you.”
Her mom, in awe, “Who taught you that?!”
“Auntie Kelli.”
I mean, could I be more proud?! (Admittedly, we’ve become quite well-known for the fact we counter-culturally require thank yous and hand washing to the extreme.)
We still have Thida and her whole family. And that is such a gift.
And we’re making it together. We’re still discovering new places in Mae Sot, one of which serves up delicious soft serve (or soft sever..). They let us bring in our own little parties as you saw above, and one of the staff also works at the hotel where we swim often. So now she sees us all the time for either ice cream or a swim! At least we’re attempting to balance it out 😊
Stephen is gearing up for the OneHouse worship night this come week, and he’s managed to work with local students and worship leaders to have songs available in English, Thai, Burmese, and Karen; with a variety of musicians. It is not a small feat, but it’s really beautiful how God is pulling it together.
That could be said of a lot of things in our lives. Many little things, but no small feats. Many hard things, but many beautiful things.
None to be neglected.
Now’s the time to throw in all the cliches: All good things must come to an end; celebrate that it happened, not that its over. Whatever. We were kind of bummed to head out of Mae Sot for our last few days in Bangkok.
Turns out we all look the same both frowning and smiling.
But we look better when we smile.
We did a bicycle tour that turned out to be pretty amazing!
We love Grasshopper Adventures, and our guide was amazing. We did a tour of the Green Lung of Bangkok–an island that is essentially a park or protected land. It was beautiful and swampy and jungly. Parts were nice sidewalks and roads, others were thin 1.5.-meter paths with drop-offs on both sides; a bit more precarious, but a fun adventure! And we only had one bike wreck and saw one snake, so…
We also visited our favorite Bangkok eateries and parks, and just enjoyed our last few days together.
And since it’s never enough adventure for us, we went out with a bang. We used Grab to get a taxi to the airport, which drove us for about 30 minutes before running out of gas on the side of a huge highway (five or six lanes of traffic going with us), just two kilometers from the airport! The driver stopped in the fast lane and put on a dramatic show about how he was so shocked and so disappointed; but our real question was simply, What exactly is your plan? He said he had no friends to call and didn’t know what to do. We could see we were further from fuel than the airport. We were also close enough to the airport that every taxi passing us would have passengers already. And since he seemed content to hit the steering wheel, we got out. We grabbed our stuff and took off walking down the side of the highway.
The real kicker is that he wanted us to pay, which we refused to do since he failed to get us to our location and put us at a much greater risk walking along a highway. He then got aggressive and we had to go quicker with all the bags in tow, and it was scary. Ultimately it resulted in us arriving sweaty to the airport, thankfully with enough time to spare; and a few more weeks of Grab contacting us for payment and us having to report him.
It’s never dull for us, so I guess it was a good picture of life here.
This was our re-enactment of our responses, because what can you do but laugh? (And capture the memory, so you can laugh about it all over again later.)
But really, so thankful. Beyond thankful!
After a few lovely days at the beach, we headed off to Mae Sot! This required a few domestic flights, which are just not the most amazing experiences.
After we landed safely to The Sot, we considered it a success!
In addition to lots of fun activities with the neighbor kids, they also got to visit the market with Thida, watch Thida amaze us all with Breakfast Club; see the teenage teachers pull off the Summer Program, and see Flour & Flowers work some bread, tortilla, and cinnamon roll magic. They got to meet the ladies who sew at our house and see Sojourn Studios first hand!
And then we did some things to see the best of Mae Sot! We took a Burmese cooking class at a local restaurant.
We visited waterfalls…
…and climbed them!
And visited the coffee shop photo opps that now abound in Mae Sot.
A cake at the coffee shop!
We got pretty good at taking our selfies wherever we went.
One day, we went out to a Bible school we’ve recently been partnering with. They have a screen printing business and have been printing on canvas bags we are beginning to sell with Housewares. My sister, Jenn, designed us a few stellar designs, and we all made some t-shirts and bags and just had fun learning about the screen printing process and getting to participate in it!
It was beyond a privilege to have my sisters here (nearly a month ago! Whoops!), and that hasn’t fallen on me lightly. I felt like I kept reveling in it throughout their trip. It is a privilege that we have made a new home here around the world, we’ve fallen in love with this community and made this little border town our normal. And then further, we have family we love that makes incredible sacrifices and efforts to jump around the globe and visit us here, in our little place. We get to vacate together to exotic places; we get to sit together around street food and share the experience. I get to introduce them to the little kids that know our names, to the women who fill our home every day; even to the pad Thai shop owner that knows our order and knows I can never remember how to say “lime” in Burmese. What fun to say, over and over again, “These are my orders sisters! All three of them! Yes, we do look the same, don’t we?”
It was a gift beyond so many gifts.
Round 1 arrived first!
And when Round 2 arrived, we hopped ourselves right into a taxi!
And we skipped across town to another airport to catch a flight to the beach at 3am, because why not?
And we started out this epic trip with the extravagance of a few days on the beach! Again, it’s all just beyond words.
We were on the beach for my birthday, which was just the best day ever. We had a slow breakfast at our AirBnB before heading out to my favorite beach. They brought huge 3-0 balloons from the US, and my sweet hubs managed to drive an hour to the nearest place to get helium 🙂 So of course we spent the day snapping photos and carting huge balloons across the island in our little rental car.
We spent a few days exploring the different beaches, and decided that might be the best place to get over jet lag!
And we did a puzzles, because #nurtureovernature is a thing. I laughed when one sister pulled a puzzle out of her bag; and then the next day as two of us sat down giddy to do a puzzle on our holiday.
One of the things I looked forward to most with my sisters coming was to run with my sister, Keri. She’s my favorite running partner: probably because we’re the same height and build–scarily similar–so we run at the exact same pace. I love the conversation and ease of running with her, and I’ve been dreaming of it in anticipation of this visit.
She graciously got up with me at 6am on my birthday (with jet lag!) so I could start my birthday early and with running outside (the way all good days begin!). And for our last day we ended our run at the beach, where the others met us with Starbucks.
We certainly know how to holiday, since we all come from crazy lives (theirs for kids and careers chaos; me for my friendly neighborhood chaos!).
And honestly? I had a drastically awful birthday a few years back; it ended in the ER with a community stabbing, and it was a rough recovery. It had some lasting traumatic effects, where I’ve dreaded my birthday the past few years. This was the best, and I so thoroughly enjoyed the rest, the waves, the swimming and running and being outside. My sisters and husband! That’s a lot of favorite people in this extravagantly beautiful place.
It was really redemptive. And I’m not sure what more you could ask for on your 30th birthday 😊
(Okay, well, maybe for your adoption agency to place you; for your favorite neighborhood to grow and thrive and break cycles, but hey–one miracle at a time!)
When we started the Summer Program this year, I had an inkling it was going to be a hit.
We knew we individually didn’t have the capacity, but we also knew the summer is wide open for the kids to sink or swim. Sinking looks like: boredom, that generally drives us crazy or ends in risky games and medical accidents. Swimming looks like: opportunities to learn and play safely that wear them out, that are organized enough to maintain parental & neighborhod sanity.
The kids were still reckless. They would come for breakfast every day, and in between a bowl of rice and whatever activity started at 8, we had screaming and wall climbing and stunts and what not.
But inevitably, by 8am, we had something to wrangle the chaos.
The four teachers we “hired” for Monday & Wednesday did absolutely amazing. They organized and taught about 40 kids from 8am to 11am. The littlest group went home then, and about 20 stayed on to study Geography & Science until 12pm.
We loved seeing the teenagers step into their roles, be challenged in their skills, and ultimately find their place. We were like proud sideline parents, and I loved it.
The teachers also helped pull off a little celebration ceremony, handing out certificates and small prizes for perfect attendance and the “best in” for each subject.
On Tuesday & Thursday we had play times. Sometimes we had our usual games and activities, but we also had friends who came with soccer games, sidewalk chalk, crafts, and relay races.
This was a relay, where the kids had to put on a swimming floatie, a pair of glasses, and a headband/crown. It was one of the funniest things we did all summer!
My sister’s also brought some fun little treasures! We did water colors one day, and they gave a drawing lesson to the teacher crew.
And water beads? So fun! The kids played in them, and the last day we also added some toys and small eggs filled with coins. They got to keep what they found and loved it! We even let the parents have a go, which left smiling parents and, uh, a few scratches! 😳
They brought a collection of egg dying kits from post-Easter sales, and Thida helped us hard boil over 150 eggs.
Adults and kids alike were pretty impressed with the dying process.
And some just wanted to eat their egg.
Mwei Mwei also kept up studying math & photography; The Reinforcers did some extra study of Burmese typing and learning Keynote.
And we just soaked up the time having fun with happy kids. It just worked! Thankful for a great community summer.
Life in this neighborhood is a rollercoaster.
Summertime here is from mid-March to the first of June, and it is chaotic to say the least. The kids are absolutely crazy: climbing fences and gates and trees before 7am, with so much energy and so little structure. We have kids napping on our porch; there are so many I fear aren’t fed regular meals. They’ll easily spend all day in our yard and on our porch and in our house.
Hence, the summer program. We still do Breakfast Club every weekday morning; we have two days a week of summer school classes, and two more days of play and games. We do mid-day fruit at least twice a week, plus other days of milk and packaged snacks.
Then it gets even more complicated. Many of the kids in the community live with grandparents or aunts or uncles through the school year, and their parents “call” for them over the summer. They will be sent off to Bangkok or places in Burma to stay with their parents for a few months before they return for school.
It’s also common for kids to live in Burma with grandparents while the parents work in Mae Sot. The parents, likewise, “call” for their kids over the holidays, so we have a whole new slew of kids in our neighborhood that we don’t know, but their parents know us, and they are here just for a few months.
And there is yet another group that lives here with their immediate family, but goes off to visit aunts, uncles, and cousins in Burma for the holiday.
It’s a very big, very convoluted switcheroo.
So while we still have The Breakfast Club, we added about fifteen kids and lost about twenty, presumably both temporarily. And while we have the summer program, some of the kids don’t know the routines: what our rules are, the fact that we speak Burmese (but not perfectly; no, I didn’t get that spiel…). It’s a big learning curve for all of us.
And it’s messy.
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This little boy, he left us in early December, just a few days before his birthday. We had a cake early and said our goodbyes as he moved back to Burma with his dad. Then he came back, just two weeks later. He didn’t like it, and came back to live with his mom, older sister, and younger brother.
He and his sister left again at the end of March, to leave over the summer. They said they’d be back for school in June. We gave them hugs and said goodbyes; just a few months, right?
The little brother followed just a few weeks after. I asked Thida last week, and she’s talking now about how they might stay. It is going well with their dad and grandmother–maybe the mother was the problem, and she’s still here in Mae Sot. Now they might start school in Burma this year.
That might be the last of their living in our community; I don’t even know yet. And I won’t even pretend I can swallow that. We’ve been snapping photos together for over seven years. To say we love them is the understatement of our lives here.
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This little boy: he left us last year.
His parents got in a fight and split; he was left with a grandfather and an aunt. He was then called to Bangkok by his grandmother and yet another aunt; we said our goodbyes and hoped it might be better for his messy little life.
Then he came back, a few months later. His parents are back under the same roof. They are expecting again, and I’m just not even sure what to think.
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This is a family of first-borns, amazingly enough.
Three are first-borns in their individual families, but all sent to live with their grandparents here in Mae Sot. The littlest is a youngest child in every way you could imagine! They are two more cousins & brothers that have joined at different times and then been sent back, just to really confuse it all. But these four have stayed, and made a second little family of over-achievers.
Over the summer, the oldest got a job, which we hope is just for the summer. Reality? With her switch to Thai school last year she was put back into first grade. And money in the pocket is more generally more tempting than the promise of money through education. I’m nervous she might be a nanny forever.
The older boy was called by his parents to go to Bangkok, as was the littlest little guy.
This leaves one. Left behind, not called by his parents; and now having a few breakdowns as of late.
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This girl is one of Thida’s, and we love her!
She left to go to visit an aunt for the summer, and I was so sad to not have her in the summer program. Her smile can light up a place, and a she’s a natural leader.
Thida casually mentioned she called to ask after her daughter, and they said she was in Yangon. Thida laughed about all the fun she was going to have.
I have been praying all week for her. It terrifies me to have her traveling on her own, generally a paperless young teenage girl, in a world and region where human trafficking is rampant.
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One of our Breakfast Club families is in a hard season: in the past six months they have moved into a field, living in a shanty hut with no water or electricity. They are unable to afford the insurance program we are offering and supplementing; and it’s putting us in a challenging position.
Her baby was due for vaccinations last week, and while we are no longer driving out to the clinic, I did agree to drive her to a free vaccination clinic in the market. As she got in the car, Thida asked her if her husband was working that day. She said no, as her husband was hungover from yesterday and unable to work.
Thida later told me this is her second husband, and shared their sad story. Apparently their are two more kids in Burma, and it’s just messy. We talked about how we just aren’t sure how to help, because if we help with one thing, it will just be another.
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This little boy moved to Bangkok to join his mom and dad, aunts, uncles, and cousins in Bangkok last year.
We have visited him there, and while we missed him terribly, we were hopeful.
But his grandmother & primary caregiver didn’t like Bangkok–not enough people to talk to during the day–and wanted to move back to Mae Sot with him. This week, we helped move them in a shanty room off the main road, amidst a rough crowd.
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One of the bread ladies is unexpectedly pregnant again, struggling with morning sickness with a toddler and unsure about the coming season. This week she said her husband’s boss left town–he had a great job installing windows, and the boss owed him a month’s salary when he left.
This happened last month to another bread ladies’ husband. A month’s salary owed, and the boss skips town.
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The Breakfast Club is no easy task. Creating a summer curriculum for forty kids in your house in 100 degree weather sans air con is not to be taken lightly. Sharing your kitchen with a breakfast service and bread business is challenging.
The hard part, though: It isn’t serving breakfast to 50 kids before 8am. It isn’t even the hot, sweaty kids shouting out their ABCs.
It is opening up your door to fifty kids with broken families, painful stories, instability; and saying,
Yeah, COME ON IN, with all that baggage.
Every day before 8am.