The House Collective

something i’m sad about.

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While I’ve mentioned this in our newsletter, I don’t believe I’ve officially stated it here: Sojourn Studios, who we’ve been partnering with for over two years, will be moving out of our home next month.

I’m sad about it.

In short, Sojourn Studios is a project of another local organization here in Mae Sot. They make porcelain jewelry, and recently have begun a partnership with Noonday Collection. They’re successfully making it!

For the past two years, three of their primary artisans have been working out of our house. They hired some of our favorite friends from our neighborhood and set up shop three days a week in our humble Housewares room and make tiny piece after tiny piece.

It is quite the process to do in two locations. The clay is formed and glazed before being sent to their studio to be fired. It then is brought back to be gold painted, and again sent for another firing. It then comes back for assembly and packaging.

All of this is done by three of my favorite friends, often while they are singing loudly, chatting about their families, and showering Oak with kisses.

So I’m really sad it’s all about to change.

I feel like we’re closing the door on a really unique, sweet season that brought out some incredible conversations and great friendships. I really love all three of these women, and I have loved seeing them so often through the week.

I have loved that they were here as we welcomed in Oak. I love the things they’ve taught him, and how he calls for his aunties when they arrive each morning. I love the things they’ve taught me day in and day out. I love their patience and kindness to us.

But most things do change, and often it isn’t up to us. So this isn’t anything new. Growth brings new seasons, and these ladies will be growing, too.

All three ladies are purchasing bicycles with their savings next week.
They’ll be biking together to work a few days a week, and working in a much more official studio space. And with a more official studio space, there might be less singing. I’m not sure.
There will be less of Oak.
There will be less free tea, which San Aye is particularly sad about!
There will be less leftover pancakes and coconuts for them to enjoy when they arrive in the morning.

This hasn’t been the easiest process on many of us involved. Growth usually involves growing pains, too. But we’ve known for about six months, and they are officially moving out in two weeks. So I’m searching how to say something.

I’m really, truly sad for the end of this season and the shift of this. But I’m also really thankful it happened.

the collective christmas 2018: two.

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Our meal this year was the most Burmese yet: we did it birthday style, like a birthday party for Jesus! We had mohingya, per community request:a traditional fish soup with noodles, often served at birthdays, and one of Thida’s specialities. She’s famous for hers, and it’s the best I’ve personally ever had. (I actually like hers, and I haven’t had any other I truly enjoy. That will be more understandable as you see what is put in it.)

We went to the market on Thursday to purchase 30 kilos of fish, one kilo of fish paste, a box of fish sauce, 100 kilos of noodles, ten kilos of green beans, quite a few kilos of onions and garlic, five kilos of cilantro, five banana stalks, five kilos of limes…lemongrass, turmeric, curry, salt, MSG (you can’t win at everything!)….and six bags of fried bean chips.

That evening, they started a pot of whole fish, all the fish paste, and lots of spices. That boiled in our yard for a few hours, then was set aside until morning.

The next morning we started before seven.

The fish were peeled or whatever was needed to get the meat out, which was all put into the woks.

We chopped banana stalks, boiled them in the sauce/liquid from the fish, and then added into the woks.

We chopped onions, adding half into the woks and leaving half as toppings. We chopped garlic, adding half to the woks and frying up half as toppings.

We chopped lemongrass, and added a whole lot of it into the woks. We chopped cilantro, another greenery (I couldn’t sort out what it was despite multiple conversations and dictionaries), limes, and green beans, all set aside as toppings.

Chili was cooked to be added later as a topping, and the pans it was cooked in are still making everything in them very, very spicy—a week later!

The woks were stirred together, adding water and more spices and sauces. It simmered for three to four hours.

We picked up the noodles, made and cooked fresh in the market, that afternoon. Each bowl is filled with noodles and sprinkled with pieces of fried bean chips, then set at a place at the tables. Here, a person can add their choice of mohingya: adding their own soup, adding any combo of crispy chips, green beans, cilantro, unknown greenery, chili, fish sauce, limes, onions, and garlic. Stephen and I prefer less liquid; the whole community prefers a lot. He searches for good pieces of fish; I love the banana stalks and onions. We both snuck inside to get more crispy chip pieces. I love adding lots of green beans and a bit of lime; Stephen adds chili. 

This is what a good bowl looks like to our neighbors. (Ours look pretty different.)

As we set up tables and chairs, they started in Burmese tradition: kids & lesser-friends tables outside; then adult & important-persons tables inside. This is one of my least favorite traditions: the dividing out of VIPs, serving them more and better and whatnot. I had discussed this with Thdia before, so as they made plans together, I reminded her and explained to everyone else: we wanted everyone together. We loved everyone equally, so we’d all eat equally. We wanted all the tables on the same “level” and with the same service. Thida remembered, explained that this was important to us, and we went with it. Overall, this was a success; but I will say they just couldn’t resist when our church came—VIPs in their mind—and they pulled out our ceramic bowls from the kitchen. They were forced to sit on the same playing field, but they just couldn’t serve them in plastic!    

We started serving at three o’clock in the afternoon, as the first kids returned from school. For Burmese birthday parties, you set out a few tables to serve at, and people come to eat, stepping into a free spot. Once finished, you clear out for someone else. We had tables and chairs for about thirty, but easily served near five hundred. I honestly have no idea.

There were a few things I loved about this years meal. First, it felt really Burmese: we had balloons to decorate, music—a shuffle of English Christmas music and Burmese pop—blaring from a speaker, people in and out everywhere. We had no fights or stampedes or food hoarding.

We served our church, who all came to join and prayed for our community. 

Most of our dearest friends came initially, from three to four; then word spread to all around. By six, many of those we know best were still around for the party, and we had so much food still. By the end, our dearest friends ate three to four times! We still ended up inviting a nearby children’s home to come eat—another twenty to forty?—and ultimately sent home extras in the community at 8pm!

Thida and I were in the kitchen around five, when we hadn’t even finished one wok of soup. She exclaimed how excited she was we hadn’t run out yet, and said, “God is blessing it!” She seems to see Jesus more clearly than I do sometimes.

Later that evening as we cleaned, she said it just never ran out: they’d serve bowl after bowl, hundreds of people would come, and the wok would have the same amount in it. I told her a summary of the fish and loaves of bread, and how it never ran out and they had extras, even feeding thousands. We said it felt the same. It was a really beautiful conversation. 

And for me, significant in this way: years ago, when we first started working in this community, we always marveled at how much it felt like we were living out the gospels. It was almost word for word, which was both encouraging, but also sometimes made decisions easier: we knew which way to go, we could see how God was in it. The past year or two, at some point or pattern I can’t identify, we faced so many decisions I just wasn’t sure about. Things felt so grey at times, where we weren’t sure where God was in it or how to give him glory or how to handle a predicament. At this point, and a few others in the past week or so, God was gracious to give us conversations or moments of clarity, confirmation; moments of grace.

This year, I loved the meal, the feel of the evening, the success of it. I love that people ate to their full. I love that we saw Jesus in it. I love that we also saw ourselves, just encompassed in this community: it was a Burmese party in all ways, but it was us, too. It’s weird how that happens slowly, until you realize suddenly, as if it just fell upon you. But you also like what you’ve found.

Please note: Nearly all photos in this blog are credited to Mway Mway. I realized after uploading them all that I forgot her watermark, so I’m going to give her credit here for very nearly all of these.

our favorites: flour & flowers.

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It is a bit hard to include this as a favorite, if I’m honest. It has brought a lot of heartache this year: cultural challenges, poverty issues, difficult conversations, and challenging friendships. I think it’s really only in stepping back that I can look back and see what good it is. 

It is a favorite. 

More than that, it’s a part of us; particularly me. For four years now, every week has included deliveries around Mae Sot. We have baked loaf after loaf of bread and rolled out so many tortillas.

It amazes me to think of where my language was when we started this: trying to learn the words for cup and teaspoon; flour and yeast. To now, when the ladies and I chat as we bake and have heart-level conversations about abuse and kids and faith and money. (All while they still correct my grammar. 😉)

It amazes me to think that we started this when Nyein Nyein was pregnant with her first son—who will turn three in December! And that we just met her second-born, a beautiful little girl, the day before we left last week. 

We have come so far with these ladies, learning so many skills between all five of us! We have watched Daw Ma Oo face cancer and go into remission!  When we started, we had rules about a Flour lady and Flower lady joining us each week, to carry their own responsibility. Now I only go with on Flour lady each week, so that we all pitch in to allow Daw Ma Oo to rest (and still sell her flowers), as she continues to gain back her strength after radiation & chemotherapy. 

Together, we’ve been through many childbirths, hospital stays, travels, family crises, and more. All over bowls of bread and newspaper-bundled flowers. 

It’s all too good and too messy and too beautiful to not be a favorite!

Here are a few numbers to put to the stories and smiles. 

28 September was our last Flour & Flower delivery until 2019, so many in Mae Sot filled their freezers with bread for the next couple months. We used 47 kilos of flour (that’s 103.6 pounds!) to make 65 loaves of bread, roll out 340 tortillas, and make 180 cinnamon rolls.  

Our weekly flower deliveries began in 2014, and then we started baking bread—officially creating Flour & Flowers—in July of 2015. In the three years of bread baking, the ladies and I have baked & sold: 

2,866 loaves of bread
17,115 tortillas
659 pans of cinnamon rolls

Since we are done for this year, the ladies took home some savings to help them through the next few months, and will get additional savings per our usual schedule, in December. This year they will all get the largest amount of savings yet: 5,000 baht per person, or about $150. For many of the families, that is a monthly salary at, what they would consider, a well-paid job. 

So yes, clearly it’s a favorite! It’s amazing to see what God has done. 

our favorites: schoolhouse.

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Stephen comes up with the best ideas. A few months ago, I mentioned we started something new through Stephen’s great idea and a grant from Kingdom Mission Fund.

It’s easily a favorite these days.

Currently, we have ten students and four adults learning English. We have four students learning guitar and one more learning cajon. (Even more incredibly, thanks to the help of some friends in Mae Sot and Stephen pre-organizing all the curriculum, all these are continuing to study while we’re away!)

There are lots of reasons to love schoolhouse.

First, we love seeing the kids and adults succeed; to be so proud of themselves. It’s fun to work with them on it, helping them learn and answering questions.

For English, Rosetta Stone is a pretty incredible program. I’m so thankful it allows me to be everything other than a teacher in these classes! Sometimes I watch kids; sometimes I help with pronunciation. Stephen is often the technology specialist: helping them understand the warnings that open, or why the microphone doesn’t work.

One day Stephen had run to the hospital while I oversaw two boys’ English lessons. One of them was having a hard time with Rosetta Stone understanding him, so I was trying to help as he would repeat, “It is a car. It is a car. It…is…a….car. IT IS A CAR. IT IS A CAR.” Then he switched to Burmese. “IT ISN’T WORKING BECAUSE STEPHEN ISN’T HERE.”

So at least we all know what our roles are 😁

And while Rosetta Stone is amazing, it’s very gracious with pronunciation. VERY. Sometimes I can’t tell what they were supposed to be saying!

For guitar, we have an app that teaches them a chord, and then has them play it with a song. They have to hit it on beat and get the chord correct. (Not that surprising for the idea of learning guitar.)

And then for cajon, Stephen has a separate lesson with this student every Friday. They have been working their way through a video course, and he’s getting pretty good!

I think our favorite part of Schoolhouse are the one-on-one opportunities it gives us. As the community keeps growing, it’s hard to stay connected to those we know best and have known the longest. Sometimes they are actually more stable now than they were; while the more unstable families ask for assistance and take more time. These classes have really allowed us to pick and choose some individuals we can invest in, hopefully with long-term impact on their language and music skills, learning opportunities, and mentorship.

We continue to ruminate on to Jared Diamond’s words, “I have heard many anecdotal stories, among my own friends, of children who were raised by difficult parents but who nevertheless became socially and cognitively competent adults, and who told me that what had saved their sanity was regular contact with a supportive adult other than their parents, even if that adult was just a piano teacher whom they saw once a week for a piano lesson.” (The World Until Yesterday, p.190) Here’s to hoping these lessons are just that–in difficult home situations, amidst the challenges of poverty–one hour a week with a friend willing to stumble over languages, laugh, and learn new skills together.

our favorites: toddler schoolhouse.

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This is easily one of our favorites. Toddlers are such fun in any culture, and when they are shouting out “Auntie Kelli! Uncle Stephen!” it just gets better.

For years, in our effort to learn Burmese and in our personal dread of teaching, we have avoided English classes. I have tried one here and there, but I am not a teacher. I was doing it out of love. But I will be the first to admit that as students dropped off or forgot to show, I was relieved and occasionally elated. That is probably the end of any class.

Then last year arrived, when a favorite “little sister” took her matriculation for Burmese high school. It is the equivalent of the American ACT or SAT standardized test, with six subjects: Burmese, English, math, chemistry, biology, and physics. She was second in her class at the high school down the street, and we knew she’d do well. What we didn’t anticipate was her passing five subjects and failing one: English.

As her native-English auntie and uncle that spent hours upon hours a week with her, this was a big failure on our part. We still feel awful for her now, retaking her senior year in Burma with hopes to try the test again next year.

But, that has led to another attempt at English. We won’t let this happen again! Our first step was to buy two Rosetta Stone licenses for adults and students to learn English without us being the official teacher.

The second step was a toddler class. They learn so fast, it seemed an obvious step. They are also so very easy to entertain; I thought surely I could teach colors, numbers, shapes, and basic words with little preparation. And just in case I couldn’t, I called in help from Mway Mway. Before she begins making jewelry on Thursday, she helped with the class. She would rally the kids while I taught English, and then we’d swap. I’d rally the kids while she taught Burmese.

It has turned out to be the highlight of every week!

First, there are the backpacks: all empty, some purses, some lunch boxes. All carried in with great importance.

Then, there are the cutest kids ever.  I’ve been focusing on colors, counting, animals & sounds, and opposites.

We have this fun opposite book that teaches them the idea, and then we’ll use a few of them: we sing the ABCs quietly and then loudly; we sing Head & Shoulders slowly & then fast. Before we sing If You’re Happy & You Know It, I go over happy and sad. I act them out: HAPPY! with a smile; ssaaadddd with a frown. Zwe, without fail, shouts SAD! with a giant smile on his face.

Stephen also leads our singing with guitar, which the kids love. It’s really our very own little library storytime, and I’m not sure I could love something more!

We do animal sounds, which has turned out hilariously. They love Old McDonald but struggle through every bit except ei-ei-o. And we left a lion in at the end, despite it not being a farm animal, because it is fun to growl at each other. I also taught them a few with hand motions: “elephant” with a trunk; and “rabbit” with little ears. What I didn’t realize was that as I do the rabbit ears I also say, “Bop bop bop.” So now they all make rabbit ears and say “Bop bop bop.” Whoops.

The colors are going off the best–easy to review in the afternoons and we all love picking out the colors we’re each wearing! One week I asked the usual, “Who is wearing BLUE?” Zuzu proudly lifted up her dress and pointed to her panties, “BLUE! I’m wearing BLUE!” She was right, at least 😂

We’ve also been practicing our colors with superheroes: SPIDERMAN! Spiderman is RED and BLUE. The HULK! The HULK is GREEN and PURPLE. We have hand motions, as you can see below. It’s adorable.

The mixture of Burmese & English is tricky for little brains: they struggle to know which to say. I teach them all the colors in English, and then Mwei Mwei follows in Burmese. This leads to them shouting all the colors in all the languages. We have since decided it’s better if we teach different things for now: she’s been focusing on fruits, vegetables, and first words. In the mean time, there is a lot of confusion about chicken–which is pronounced similar to “jet” in Burmese, and is now most often called “jetkin” in our home. Again, whoops. I mentioned I wasn’t a great teacher, right?

It’s been a great opportunity to give the kids attention and teaching, in addition to the social lessons of thank you’s and following instructions. And of course we go home with a snack, so that everyone’s winning!

new skills, new perspectives.

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Mwei Mwei is one of my favorites. (Or Mway Mway; she uses both because it’s really မွှေးမွှေး) After a little hiatus to Bangkok, she’s been back in our lives for over a year now. She makes porcelain jewelry for Sojourn Studios two days per week, and also sews canvas bags for Housewares one day per week. With this job, she also studies at our house: she takes private Thai lessons once per week that are subsidized by Sojourn Studios; I’ve been teaching her math; and Stephen’s been teaching her guitar and photography. We have hopes of starting her on Rosetta Stone in English in coming months.

We’ve learned that if you can find something she loves or cares about, she’ll give it her all. If she doesn’t care or feels she’s competing with a sibling, she sits back and quite obviously doesn’t put in effort. It’s been a learning curve to find her strengths, find her passions, and get to know her.

One of those things that motivates her? Photography. She loves it, and has an eye for it. She has been easy to teach and has picked it up quickly. And now we want to show her that she can make a future of this; she has skills she can offer to both us and the whole world.

So after a few months of photography lessons on Stephen’s Canon DSLR, we’ve given her the project of taking photos in the community every week. She can choose what to photograph: Sojourn Studios jewelry, the kids playing or taking classes, sewing projects, The Breakfast Club, Flour & Flowers, The Reinforcers. She captures photos through the week, and in her class she sorts and edits, with Stephen’s oversight.

Nyein Nyein, one of our Flour & Flower bakers, and the best tortilla roller!

Pyint Soe, a Reinforcer and high school student; son of Daw Ma Oo, the Flower Lady

And then we buy them! Each week, we pay her for the photos that are good. We give her two different rates, for if she captures a good moment, but perhaps it not fully in focus or not well aligned. Photographically it might not be amazing, but we love the people and love that she captured it! And then, when she really captures a beautiful photo with great skill, she makes a pretty decent price for our little neighborhood!

Since we started, she’s made a few extra dollars most weeks. Last week, she took photos of San Aye making jewelry, and did an absolutely stellar job. She made nearly double her weekly salary!

We’re pretty excited about this. We’ve helped her create a watermark, and explained how this shows everyone it’s her photography. We showed her this blog and our monthly updates, so she understands where the photos are used and why. We’ve explained how our friends and family in the States want to meet our friends and learn about our lives here; and that through gifts of the Church, we are able to do all these projects and create jobs like hers.

It’s always intimidating to share all of this with our neighborhood. But a friend posted an African proverb the other day that I think captures it quite well, “Until the lion learns how to write, every story will glorify the hunter.”

While I think this captures the point, I’m not sure I want to be represented as a hunter, nor do I wish to present my friends as lions. But the idea still stands that if we never open this up to their perspectives, you will only see ours.

I don’t know if we’re to the point we can equip our neighbors to tell their own stories, but I hope someday we can. For now, this feels like one of the first steps. We want you to see our neighborhood, and for our friends to be presented, from another view that isn’t just ours. We don’t want you to always see what we see or praise what we praise; it will probably always make us look good.

But if we give our friends room to tell you themselves, to show you their lives and their work and their skills, we hope that honors them.

So enjoy these beautiful photos that Mwei Mwei skillfully captured, and be looking for more photos with her watermark on it! We are excited to see where this can take her, and us, too.