The House Collective

the collective christmas 2018: three.

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After our Christmas meal on Friday, we spent all day Saturday helping to make OneHouse Live :: Christmas Carols happen that evening. I didn’t snap any photos, but it was beautiful. Stephen did an incredible job and had a number of carols, all in a collection of local languages. He had singers for English, Burmese, Karen, & Thai; and it was lovely to hear as we gathered around candles. Some of our community teenagers came to join, Pyint Soe ran sound as Stephen led, and it was just beautiful. 

Sunday welcomed in our church Christmas: hundreds of people, five loads of people from our community. Music and dancing, the Gospel, a meal, and a raffle! It’s an event, to say the least. 

A few favorite moments: Stephen being a proud community dad, going to the front to take photos of the kids’ dancing. And the kids seeing him, beaming with pride, and missing a few steps.

One of the sweetest husbands in our community came along and was sitting just in front of his wife and I. I love that she kept having him lean forward so she could straighten his shirt. The woman next to him, who we didn’t know, had a hard time with the raffle. Perhaps she didn’t quite get it; perhaps she couldn’t read her numbers? I’m not sure. Either way, every time a number was called, she’d lean over and ask him if that was hers. He’d politely say no, repeat her number to her, and smile. Every time. This is through hundreds of plastic bins, fans, blankets, a rice cooker, bicycles: so many raffle numbers. So many times. He kept smiling, friendly as ever, and I was shaking with laughter behind them. 

Some of our neighbors won in the raffle. And Stephen won a fan! 

In the midst of all these Christmas activities, we spend our days at the market, secretly trying to buy hundreds of gifts. We sneak them into the house and fill our side with piles of gifts and wrapping paper. 


This year was the best yet for gifts, too. It gets easier the more we know the kids; and the more we accept the discrepancies. We are getting better at abandoning fairness for friendship—who we know best and where the deepest relationships are, we get them better gifts that suit them. We do know them and know what they’d like; that’s a part of friendship! For those we might know by name or perhaps from a medical emergency, we find a more generic gift. Sometimes unfairness is hard to embrace, but it makes the gift giving much more fun.

For those families we know really need more, we give more. We use Christmas to provide extra to the families that are struggling the most, giving them new toothbrushes, toothpaste and soap, warm and new clothes for the constantly growing kids; and making sure the parents, too, have enough to wear.

This year, we did blankets for all the families. Previously we’ve given toiletries: toothbrushes, toothpaste, laundry detergent, soap. But in many ways our community has stabilized. We still included these things for some of the families we know really need them, but every family received a blanket.  

Some families received just a blanket. The families we know well–a little over a hundred–each received a bag of gifts with their blanket. Inside was a gift or collection of gifts for each individual.

There were many highlights this year. First, we didn’t “forget” anyone (people we don’t really know, but they “know” us) or have kids (again, from a few streets over; they’ve heard of us) come to the door begging for gifts. That’s a big, big win.

And then there were just perfect little moments. When we gave San Aye her family’s blanket, she smiled broadly and said she’d told Mway Mway that’s what she hoped for this year because she really needed one. 

When we went out to a group of families that live in the field behind our house, the kids came running out to the car. Really, they just know our car (it’s pretty loud, and they can see it coming on the road) and always come running to say hi. But when they saw the presents: the biggest smiles. And Lin Tet Oo came in for a big hug.  

In one house, they said thank you for the gifts, and we started walking away. Just around the house we heard paper rip open and a four-year-old girl squeal, “A new shirt! A new SHIRT! It’s beautiful!” 

At Thida’s house, the boys were comparing their shooter marbles and talking about how they’d play together. Kyaw Gee immediately got started on his off-brand Lego set, and Yedi gushed over her “Y” necklace—a friendship set with her best friend, Yaminoo, having the same one.

It’s uncommon to open gifts in front of people, so the older girls took their gifts with a thank you, and then slowly, subtly make their way into the house while the younger kids open their gifts at the outside sitting area.  But then adorably, just a few minutes later, the older girls come running out smiling, holding up their treasures with huge smiles and thank yous!  It was really fun to see them love them and feel like we really did a good job finding things they’ll love. 

It should be noted that with all the late night wrapping, early morning wrapping, and lots of coffee in between—plus my giddy joy at their liking all the gifts!—I nearly fell off the bridge returning from Thida’s house! It was really close—scarily close—and would have left me with a number of broken bones on Christmas Eve. So we’ll just note that as the Christmas miracle 2018!

Really, this Christmas felt pretty miraculous. It went so smoothly, and had very few lows. It can be hard to host an epic Christmas, in a poorer community, with friends and acquaintances alike.  It can be a lot for us and wear us out. But per the season, God was really gracious to us. He’s been gracious, despite some really challenging things lofted our way. We’re thankful for the miracles he’s sent our way, too.

the collective christmas 2018: two.

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Our meal this year was the most Burmese yet: we did it birthday style, like a birthday party for Jesus! We had mohingya, per community request:a traditional fish soup with noodles, often served at birthdays, and one of Thida’s specialities. She’s famous for hers, and it’s the best I’ve personally ever had. (I actually like hers, and I haven’t had any other I truly enjoy. That will be more understandable as you see what is put in it.)

We went to the market on Thursday to purchase 30 kilos of fish, one kilo of fish paste, a box of fish sauce, 100 kilos of noodles, ten kilos of green beans, quite a few kilos of onions and garlic, five kilos of cilantro, five banana stalks, five kilos of limes…lemongrass, turmeric, curry, salt, MSG (you can’t win at everything!)….and six bags of fried bean chips.

That evening, they started a pot of whole fish, all the fish paste, and lots of spices. That boiled in our yard for a few hours, then was set aside until morning.

The next morning we started before seven.

The fish were peeled or whatever was needed to get the meat out, which was all put into the woks.

We chopped banana stalks, boiled them in the sauce/liquid from the fish, and then added into the woks.

We chopped onions, adding half into the woks and leaving half as toppings. We chopped garlic, adding half to the woks and frying up half as toppings.

We chopped lemongrass, and added a whole lot of it into the woks. We chopped cilantro, another greenery (I couldn’t sort out what it was despite multiple conversations and dictionaries), limes, and green beans, all set aside as toppings.

Chili was cooked to be added later as a topping, and the pans it was cooked in are still making everything in them very, very spicy—a week later!

The woks were stirred together, adding water and more spices and sauces. It simmered for three to four hours.

We picked up the noodles, made and cooked fresh in the market, that afternoon. Each bowl is filled with noodles and sprinkled with pieces of fried bean chips, then set at a place at the tables. Here, a person can add their choice of mohingya: adding their own soup, adding any combo of crispy chips, green beans, cilantro, unknown greenery, chili, fish sauce, limes, onions, and garlic. Stephen and I prefer less liquid; the whole community prefers a lot. He searches for good pieces of fish; I love the banana stalks and onions. We both snuck inside to get more crispy chip pieces. I love adding lots of green beans and a bit of lime; Stephen adds chili. 

This is what a good bowl looks like to our neighbors. (Ours look pretty different.)

As we set up tables and chairs, they started in Burmese tradition: kids & lesser-friends tables outside; then adult & important-persons tables inside. This is one of my least favorite traditions: the dividing out of VIPs, serving them more and better and whatnot. I had discussed this with Thdia before, so as they made plans together, I reminded her and explained to everyone else: we wanted everyone together. We loved everyone equally, so we’d all eat equally. We wanted all the tables on the same “level” and with the same service. Thida remembered, explained that this was important to us, and we went with it. Overall, this was a success; but I will say they just couldn’t resist when our church came—VIPs in their mind—and they pulled out our ceramic bowls from the kitchen. They were forced to sit on the same playing field, but they just couldn’t serve them in plastic!    

We started serving at three o’clock in the afternoon, as the first kids returned from school. For Burmese birthday parties, you set out a few tables to serve at, and people come to eat, stepping into a free spot. Once finished, you clear out for someone else. We had tables and chairs for about thirty, but easily served near five hundred. I honestly have no idea.

There were a few things I loved about this years meal. First, it felt really Burmese: we had balloons to decorate, music—a shuffle of English Christmas music and Burmese pop—blaring from a speaker, people in and out everywhere. We had no fights or stampedes or food hoarding.

We served our church, who all came to join and prayed for our community. 

Most of our dearest friends came initially, from three to four; then word spread to all around. By six, many of those we know best were still around for the party, and we had so much food still. By the end, our dearest friends ate three to four times! We still ended up inviting a nearby children’s home to come eat—another twenty to forty?—and ultimately sent home extras in the community at 8pm!

Thida and I were in the kitchen around five, when we hadn’t even finished one wok of soup. She exclaimed how excited she was we hadn’t run out yet, and said, “God is blessing it!” She seems to see Jesus more clearly than I do sometimes.

Later that evening as we cleaned, she said it just never ran out: they’d serve bowl after bowl, hundreds of people would come, and the wok would have the same amount in it. I told her a summary of the fish and loaves of bread, and how it never ran out and they had extras, even feeding thousands. We said it felt the same. It was a really beautiful conversation. 

And for me, significant in this way: years ago, when we first started working in this community, we always marveled at how much it felt like we were living out the gospels. It was almost word for word, which was both encouraging, but also sometimes made decisions easier: we knew which way to go, we could see how God was in it. The past year or two, at some point or pattern I can’t identify, we faced so many decisions I just wasn’t sure about. Things felt so grey at times, where we weren’t sure where God was in it or how to give him glory or how to handle a predicament. At this point, and a few others in the past week or so, God was gracious to give us conversations or moments of clarity, confirmation; moments of grace.

This year, I loved the meal, the feel of the evening, the success of it. I love that people ate to their full. I love that we saw Jesus in it. I love that we also saw ourselves, just encompassed in this community: it was a Burmese party in all ways, but it was us, too. It’s weird how that happens slowly, until you realize suddenly, as if it just fell upon you. But you also like what you’ve found.

Please note: Nearly all photos in this blog are credited to Mway Mway. I realized after uploading them all that I forgot her watermark, so I’m going to give her credit here for very nearly all of these.

the collective christmas 2018: one.

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It was our best Christmas yet, in so many ways.  

Do I say that every year? I hope so. Mostly, I think we’re just learning more and more each year; learning what to expect, learning Burmese culture, learning our best friends, learning ourselves. 

I’ll start with my favorite photo this year: just a day after we returned. I was meeting with Thida to create our Christmas plan–we certainly needed her help! And the kids wandered in to find our Christmas tree, which we’d just set up the night before. As the best tree on the block, and it draws quite a lot of awe!

We started the festivities with a movie night. On Sunday night–just a couple days after getting back into town!–we pulled out the projector, opened up some cookie tins, and blared Home Alone in our yard. We didn’t have a Burmese translation or subtitles, so we’d just shout a translation over the parts that seemed confusing. 🤷🏼‍♀️ Either way, slap-stick humor is funny in all languages.

It was the best kickoff we could have imagined! Hearing the adults and kids alike laughing their hearts out was amazing. 

My two favorite moments: About twenty seconds in, as the thief is in the house entryway, pretending to be a police officer, Thida says to those around her, “I don’t think he’s a real cop! I think he’s faking!”
Yeah, you’re going to get this just fine. ☺️

Then, Kevin uses the trick repeatedly of playing the movie in the background to scare off people at the door, “I’ll give you to the count of ten to get your ugly, yella, no-good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead…Keep the change ya filthy animal!” Same trick; repeatedly, folks. And they all laughed their heads off every. single. time. I loved it. 

We even had guests join us in the street. Look closely and you’ll see a grown man sitting in a stroller he pulled up as a chair. We know how to throw a party!

On Tuesday we had storytime after school. Thida read the Christmas story from the Jesus Storybook Bible, and we crafted our own nativities.

It was chaotic and lovely! The kids left with nativities and fruit.

There are reasons we don’t use glue often, though. There was also a nativity glued to our motorbike seat, and a few on our inside walls. Glue stick works better than you’d think. 🤦🏼‍♀️

The next day we sang a few carols in Burmese and played games, including a disaster of Bingo. That was the low point and I might be permanently finished with the game…but “pass the present” and a few other simple games were a big hit! Either way, beyond the singing, it was far too chaotic for photos. We all survived!

And then we were off to the market to kick off our Collective Christmas Meal!

surreal, but nice: seven.

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And while in France, we felt we just couldn’t pass up Paris! We headed to the city just a few days before our flight, so we could bunk up in a tiny little AirBnB flat and enjoy all the classic tourist activities and the Parisian streets in between.

Of course, the Louvre. Having been deprived of regular museum visits for nearly a decade now, I absolutely loved this. We were there when it opened, stayed until it closed, and loved it.

They had a special room–can’t remember the name now!–but they had pieces you could touch. It was pretty full with kids on field trips, since it was of course the easiest place for the teachers to manage! But there was also a man with his wife. The man was blind, and his wife described the pieces as he felt them. And this was perhaps one of my favorite moments.

And the Eiffel Tower. (With my husband who graciously takes photos with me using apps I’ve learned about from our neighbors!) I honestly expected this to be a bit of a disappointment and was pleasantly surprised. It was incredible and beautiful to see.

Notre Dame was stunning. We we warned for the lines, but arrived early enough to walk right in. It was lovely to see, but even more lovely to sit.

My favorite statue inside of Notre Dame was this one. It was donated by a Christian organization in China, in honor of a martyred Chinese Christian. It’s a statue of Jesus, with a Anglo-Saxon boy to one side and a Asian boy on the other. I love it for many reasons, some probably more obvious than others.

Just around the corner from Notre Dame was the very best bookstore I’ve ever been to. Since we already had a carry-on full of books, we sadly bought none. But I loved our afternoon there enough that it deserves a photo!

And the Sacre-Coeur.

We also showed up here earlier than most (perhaps we’re a bit morning folks, used to 5:30am breakfast service!), and caught part of the early morning mass. We loved it.

And, the flagship Apple store in Paris, which just opened in November. We visited that, too.

While I can’t say I get too excited about Apple store visits, this was a stunning building they renovated. It was four or five floors and really beautifully restored.

Christmas markets were set up all over Paris, so we trekked through those for most of our dinners and enjoyed all the classics: pretzels and raclette and hot chocolate and macaroons and other things we don’t know the names of. So much good cheese!

For a once-in-a-lifetime trip we never guessed 2018 would hold, it was far more incredible than we could have imagined! Surreal, but nice.

surreal, but nice: six.

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And then we had the opportunity to experience France–which was followed by a chaotic community Christmas, hence the long pause between posts! But France was incredible. Surreal, but incredibly, amazingly nice.

I mentioned briefly before, but will say again: Restored & Renewed Ministry, Sherry, Graham & Heather, their kids–the whole crew welcomed us in with such kindness. Warmth, grace, love. All the good things in the world: they filled their little French countryside home with them and then welcomed us and others to come on in.

I doubt I’ll ever have the words to thank them or describe it to you, but I can show you the surreal photos. It was just as surreal as it seems.

Here we are in front of the lovely chateau.


In this lovely little village.

This is where we went for walks and runs, sometimes freezing and shivering, surrounded by beautiful countryside.


This is where we sat by the fire, read books, did puzzles, and played games.
This is where we celebrated a beautiful Thanksgiving.

It’s funny the things that can make anywhere feel like home. For me, party mix. (And Jif peanut butter is probably on that list, too.)

They also took us on adventures, to beautiful cities like Troyes. And to have delicious, liquified Lindt hot chocolate. (Best ever.)

And to Doremy, Joan of Arc’s hometown! And her cathedral. So many beautiful cathedrals.

And to Strasbourg, in the loveliest day! My family is from the Alsace-Lorraine region, and of my immediate family, I was the first to go visit! It was so fun to see the culture and history, and to feel a connection to it.

We were also there for the first weekend of Christmas markets, and got to visit the traditional Strasbourg Christmas Market! All the heart eyes. 😍


surreal, but nice: five.

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A few other special notes that were particularly surreal, but particularly nice. 

This was our first autumn to be back in America in a very, very long time. Eight years, in fact. 

Honestly, I’d forgotten what it was like. There would be times driving down tree-lined roads in Thailand, with dead leaves falling from trees, I’d note that it felt like fall.  But it isn’t really about the falling, it’s the colors. It’s beyond description!

I found myself practicing conversations in Burmese with our neighbors, trying to explain to them the incredible vibrancy of the colors: the reds and yellows and oranges, so bright, so bold, and then they just fall! I found myself picking up leaves and gluing them into my notebook, just trying to capture it. 

I am so glad we were there for a fall this year. 

We were married in the fall, and thus celebrated our anniversary  among the fall colors this year!

While we limited our travel as much as possible, we had some really sweet friends make drives to see us. In most cases, it was a significant sacrifice of money and time to do that, and we are really, really thankful. 

I–and really, we–were able to work with these guys with The Spero Project for just a year in OKC. It was a short year, but it has sparked a great friendship. We are thankful for the moments we get with them.

And for the time we get with their incredible, spunky kids!

This friend also came through town (and her amazing family, but didn’t snap that group photo, so…) for a job interview for her husband, and I am so thankful for the time we had!

These guys drove their family of six a long twelve hours for a weekend together! We loved it.

After meeting and doing life together in Mae Sot, it was fun to catch up and chat stateside. People who know you on both continents are few and far between. 

This mentor and hero of ours met with us faithfully twice a week, starting some early mornings over coffee and bagels. The hours of wise words, advice, counsel, and truth he pours over us are hard to capture. We’re just honored to know him and thankful he has walked this road with us since before we were married. Paul, you’re a faithful friend and we thank the Lord for you and the moments we get together.

The two most popular questions about living overseas:
What are the toilets like?
What foods do you miss most? 

I miss Zaza’s House Salad: spinach and greens, pecans, blueberries, strawberries, goat cheese, and a vinaigrette.  The BEST. And lots of things we don’t often get here. 

But we did get to enjoy a date out for salads 😍

And last, one of the things Stephen loves to do in big cities is visit the Apple store. Some of them are “flagship stores” that offer different classes or trainings, have unique designs…I’m not sure. But we go. And since we don’t buy anything, it’s a cheap activity! We’re both winning 😂

This was in Chicago, in the huge store of glass they have there. And–spoiler!–we also visited the newest flagship store in Paris and there’s another photo of that coming! 😁😂  
#thethingsyoudoforpeopleyoulove

surreal, but nice: four.

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And those surreal, but nice moments with the Bluniers!

Meal times are one of my favorite things to come back for. Thankfully, they happen all year 😄

I love being gathered around a table, often with laughter, often with better food than I’m used to! This company is what I miss most, and thus, what feels the most surreal and the most nice.

We limited our travel on this trip, since it was already so full; but so many people traveled to see us! One of those was my grandmother and her husband, which meant so much to us. 

Throughout the year, I’ve been in a Book Club with my niece. We’ve been reading The Giver series and Skyping to discuss it. While I was stateside, we got to meet for our Book Club in person at Starbucks!

She also chose to do her school project on Myanmar, so we met to practice a few phrases of Burmese and for me to answer some questions. 

I attempted to teach her a few of the games the kids in the neighborhood play. This one requires rocks, which are surprisingly hard to find near a Starbucks parking lot…so we used the cough drops in my bag. Either way, it was hilarious; and we were throwing cough drops all over Starbucks and then chasing them down.

I think I’ll love this photo forever. It’s already on my wall. 

While Stephen helped my parents with an Apple purchase, I [got bored and] popped over to Anthropologie. Here I found my sister, who had left her kids with another sister during an appointment and “ran by Anthropologie” on the way to pick them up. She was caught by all of us. 

And I have just never run into my sister in a store in Thailand, so…loved that.

We caught my sister’s birthday, too! A walk in the park, with kids, cake pops, and coffee for the win!

I must say, I thought cake pops were overrated. How good could they be?

This was my first cake pop ever. I got cookie dough. Folks, this was a ball of cookie dough, covered in icing, and called a cake pop!

Pretty sure I went home and told Stephen we needed to fit in as many cake pops before we left as possible. That might explain why our neighbors welcomed us back with our traditional greeting, “You’ve gotten so white and fat!”

These were our last ones as we left Chicago.

 We tried to take a family photo. And they wanted to stand here. 😂

surreal, but nice: three.

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Since our goal for the time in America was to see our families, these are my favorite, surreal moments with the Spurlocks!

The last time we left America, Kat was pregnant with twin girls. Instead of dwelling on the milestones we missed, I’ll just say I’m glad we got to meet them sooner than we thought! 

We celebrated Stephen’s birthday when we arrived, and later Rex’s birthday. I love the memories around this table.

They did a Christmas meal for us before we left, with all the traditions! 😍

We all went to a Razorback football game as a family, my first one! So much fun, and one of the few they won this year. 😬

The sun was coming from the right side, and I hope I never forget Rex putting on his hat sideways. To be fair, Stephen & I both came home with one side of our face burnt, so kudos to the smart ones of the crew!

On Rex’s birthday we went out to lunch in his Chevelle and ate at a fish restaurant that was very “Spurlock.”  One of my favorite days we had. 

less and less.

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School was my prime. I wish someone had told me that. I wish someone told me how easy it was for me, this was my thing; this was my prime of life.

…And that it would have an end. That would have been helpful, too.

Each year, I knew more and more. Knowledge built on knowledge. It made so much sense that way.

But then I left school, and somehow each year that comes I know less and less. 

That is what I was reminded of in traveling around the world for a couple months and then returning to this street, where everybody knows my name. I am reminded that I know less and less with each turn of the world. 

The more I learn of Burmese, the more I realize I don’t know. 
The more I come to understand one situation, the more I know I don’t understand the other ninety-two. Yesterday my day whirled into one constant reminder of this. 

And then today, I was listening to the Savvy Sauce podcast’s interview with Annie Chapman, and she said this so well. “The older I get, the less I know. But what I know, I know for sure. And this is what I know: that God is good.”

surreal, but nice: two.

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This is mostly a collection of what I don’t want to forget. Perhaps it was so surreal and so nice, I want to cherish and re-cherish all the details. 

This is how tired we were when we left. 

We landed first into Paris, where we planned to spend a couple hours in the train station before we left on the 5am train. 

Well, the train station closes, which no one we had chatted with seemed to know! Whoops. We couldn’t find a restaurant open or a coffee shop, or really much of anything within walking distance with two large suitcases. So instead, we found a bus stop. This provided a seat and a glass wall to block the wind, making the 50 degree weather a little more bearable to us. We opened up our suitcases to change Stephen’s Chacos for Converse; and we pulled out every warm layer we brought. Every single one, which really wasn’t that much. We wore it all, then huddled down between our suitcases (also wind blockers), and waited out the three hours until our train arrived!  

Once we arrived, soon-to-be-friends were waiting for us at the station and drove us out the house. It’s hard to even begin to explain how gracious and kind this family is.

Perhaps I should start with the official side of things: they’ve created an organization, Restored & Renewed Ministry.  One of the couples is two counselors, one of which we’ve been Skyping with for over a year.  Their daughter and son-in-law moved their family to France to manage a chateau that their family collectively bought to use for ministry.  The goal: to provide a place for overseas workers to stay and refresh. 

They have done this above and beyond what we could have imagined. It might help that we just really love them all, and it was so much fun getting to know them. They are also just incredibly hospitable, and so great in their roles. I love seeing how life and ministry can look different across different opportunities, but have so many things in common; and ultimately how God places us all so differently. 

Back to where we landed: we went out their chateau for about week on our way to the States. That first week, we slept a whole lot. And really, I think I might focus more on the chateau when we returned there after America. But we are still so thankful for that first week to breathe easier!

Our first stop Stateside was Chicago, and I don’t want to forget the unique opportunity to see two of my brother-in-laws run a marathon! We had so much fun cheering them on.

Stephen and I also went back through Chicago on our way out of the States (y’know, since that’s how round-trip tickets work!) and took a couple days to celebrate our 9th anniversary.  Since we love Chicago, it was pretty great. And since it was below freezing, we were really, really cold. 

We knew there was a large Burmese community in Chicago and found a restaurant across town. Since the “L” didn’t run too close, we used the bicycle rental system and biked there.

It was not our best idea in the below-freezing weather, and then the shop was closed. We were pretty disappointed, and were walking the block deciding where to warm up when we found a Burmese grocery! We popped inside and found it as warm as our home, boasting at least 80 degrees. We also got to meet the restaurant owner and chat with a few people in the shop. We both pretty much just loved the whole experience. It’s funny the things that feel like home; even some that aren’t home at all.

I think surreal, but nice simply fits this whole trip perfectly.