too many or too few?

I haven’t written much since we’ve been back in Mae Sot.

And to be honest, I’m not sure if its because there are too many thoughts in my head, or too few.

In many ways its the same: the same effort to take time for the kiddos across the street, that at times make me want to say “buh bye” in a syrupy sweet voice and shut my door; the same effort to embrace the opportunities we have living here–shopping at markets, communicating without words, and celebrating simplicity–while aching for a few complications of the West; the same effort to live life while poverty watches you to evaluate every step you take.

So perhaps there are equally as many thoughts, but few fresh ones.

I can say this: I still love Mae Sot, and I do love our lives here. I do still sense the lack of community–or perhaps the shift, which leaves a hole in the articulated, voiced community I’m familiar with. I do still see things changing constantly, and hope keeping everyone alive. And I still love the gorgeous hugs from beautiful little girls with newly shaved heads.