As I walked out the door this morning, a sweet girl, maybe seventeen or eighteen, was with the kids and said hesitantly, but clearly, “Kelli, you are very beautiful.”

…And when you read that, be sure you have an Asian accent on beautiful, because that is really the only way to capture it.

Not a bad way to be welcomed to the world, particularly in the midst of some recent storms. I smiled and thanked her, and wished I could tell her how much her kind words and smiles mean to me.

It also made me wonder how long had she been practicing that sentence or waiting for me to come outside.

It made me wonder what they view our lives as. And, really, it made me wonder if they view me as some sort of princess: living in a sort of castle, getting all dolled up to walk out into the world with an audience receiving her and somewhere to go. Almost watching and viewing our lives as elegant or extravagant.

Which, I find all the more interesting and funny with the fact that if other circles saw our lives here, I wonder how many would be equally horrified: at how sweaty I am after my shower; at how I “do” my hair by adding gel and blow drying it halfway; that deodorant and mascara are my only key ingredients to leaving my house. That my “castle” has a squatty potty, and recently requires me to step outside to turn our water on and off.

…But my castle has walls, curtains, and a crazy machine that makes your bedroom cold.

It’s truly amazing how much perspective changes things.

I wonder what they think as they watch us: if they wonder where we go to the bathroom inside, or if they are curious why on earth I’m always sweating. Or if they understand that there is water inside of our house and a machine that keeps things cold.

For instance, when the kids open their eyes wide to cold water, discover magnets, and open our fridge with a look of surprise, its no wonder they like to sit and watch me cook or watch me hang the wet clothes that came out of the machine in the corner.  But do their parents know? Do they run home, recount what they’ve seen and have their parents explain? Or do they recount things that their parents are in awe at, too? Are the parents just as curious?

I suppose I didn’t start today thinking I lived the life of a princess in a castle, and now I’m wondering if I do.

Stephen’s helmet was stolen off his motorbike during home church yesterday.

Boo.

And since Mae Sot doesn’t sell helmets a) with a chin guard or b) large enough for our heads, here’s to a week of bicycling!

 

There has been talk of a Tescos, Big C, or something of the sort making its way to Mae Sot. This would be the equivalent of a Thai-style Walmart or Target.

I knew of the possibilities, but I was in denial. Until we passed a very large piece of land, completely flatten, with quite a lot of machinery and workers for this area, and now I’m in mourning.

I was listening to “Big Yellow Taxi” while I ran the other day,

Don’t it always seem to go
That you don’t know what you’ve got til its gone
They paved paradise
And put up a parking lot. 

I don’t think I can really stop them from putting up the monstrosity and I don’t have to shop there, but I’m determined to at least know and be thankful for what I have now.

Even on the most frustrating days, I love that its not easy to cook here. I love that I am learning to cook with new vegetables and spices; I love that I can buy things from local shops, even if that means about twenty of them have to be visited!  I love that if something sounds good, I have to start searching recipes and experiment to make it myself. The challenges have been refreshing, and have really shown me the times I have settled for an easy pick-up at the store, when making it from scratch really isn’t so difficult. And it also shows me the times that it is well worth finding a local genius who can do some things for you!

I’m watching Mae Sot “develop” around us, and I just want to be sure I soak up this time and realize what I’ve got–simplicity. 

I am currently working to expand my curriculum on the basics of democracy and civic participation. Amidst a pile of books, I have also been utilizing iTunes U: a genius Apple application where universities, colleges, and programs have provided courses and lectures for free.  There are many more to choose from than I would have expected, and it has been very helpful when we live in a place where it takes six weeks or more for a book to arrive. And did I mention that it’s free?

Either way, I’m currently listening through lectures on the basic premises of democracy. The state university, which I’ll respectfully leave unmentioned, has an intro to each lecture, where they flash political words in front of corresponding pictures. Example: “The Constitution” in front of the famous We the people… with a feather pen; “Congress” with a photo of the House meeting.

Cheesy? Yes.

But its just a brief intro for free lecture, right?

…Then I saw “Foreign Policy” with a picture of an army tank.

I’m sorry, what?

Is that really how we want our foreign policy portrayed?!

There is a small university in Mae Sot, and some of our co-workers in Partners have attended there part time.  As part of the course, there is a group project where you interview a foreigner. Today, Stephen had the privilege of completing his second interview since we moved here.

I think the group puts the questions together themselves. Both times they have brought questions to us and ask us to edit them. They then practice asking the questions, and the whole experience is recorded and edited.

I thought the questions were noteworthy. The questions included, but are not limited to:

How many countries have you visited?

How many times a month do you go shopping?

How many countries are in the UN?

How many languages are in the world?

What is your favorite international food?
…Your choices are: appetizer, main dish, side dish, or dessert.

What does the Harry Potter actor look like?

…And the best: If you dream about spiders, what does the dream mean?

…Or working on it.

I was engrossed recently by another blog. After spending a large amount of time reading back over a years’ worth of a stranger’s posts, I began asking myself why this was so intriguing to me. Among other reasons, I determined that I was drawn to her gratitude. She was optimistic and thankful for a variety of situations that came her way, and it challenged me.

There are days I love living here, but there are plenty I don’t as well. Recently, the weight of it all has seemed so, well, weighted. I have had to deal with the sorrows and there have been more tears than usual. I have tried to simply avoid blogging or try to present a more positive spin on things, but it’s obvious. I’m aware of it. The weight, the grief, the sadness.

And I suppose I simply don’t want my blog, and further my life, to be permeated with this.

So this week, I’ve begun to pray for joy, and I’ve tried to embrace it. I’m working on celebrating the littlest things around us. I’m choosing gratitude.

My hope is that someday, when we’re back in the States, I can at least say that I fully embraced this stage of our lives, for every curve ball it threw at us.

We visited the big city of Chiang Mai again this week!

And the big city is busy.  We went up for meetings, but did our best to squeeze in visiting friends, shopping, doctor visits, and delicious food.

We enjoyed some wonderful food and enjoyed the shopping. We managed to find a bookshelf at half the price we’ve found in Mae Sot, as well as some handmade hooks and photo frames. We found a few English books, which I always love, and a few didn’t-make-export-quality (but we approve) clothing items.

Oh, and I stocked up on grains and seeds and spices that we don’t have in Mae Sot. Our lives are quite simple here, and I’m fairly excited to experiment with my bread, bagels, and granola bars.

The most significant & purposeful aspect of our trip were the meetings, and there were quite a few. We first met with the new teams & volunteer coordinators and officially ended our previous role at Partners and fully embraced the next stage! We’ve been balancing multiple roles for the past couple months, so we’re excited about this. Stephen also met to discuss more plans for file sharing & organization, security, and communication between all of our offices and staff; and he met to discuss his photography and media roles.

We also saw a movie in the theater, which is always a highlight. Unfortunately, I was looking forward to seeing Hunger Games for weeks. I was so excited that we’d be traveling to Chiang Mai while it was playing and I had geared Stephen up for it. But apparently Thailand decided Avengers would be a little more popular, and it was playing in six of seven theaters. The last theater shared four movies I was clearly not interested in.

This was more of a disappointment than I’d like to admit. It led to a discussion of how it’s the smallest, weirdest, silliest things that make you frustrated to live here, and this was one of mine.

We also visited a couple doctors while we were in town, including the dentist. I determined the low point was not receiving a new toothbrush at the end of the visit. I went out to purchase us some new ones today, since we earned them for going to the dentist; and I dropped Stephen’s on the bathroom floor last week, so we’ve been sharing. Stephen thought the high point was not having small talk.  It’s a little hard to chat about where you live and where you work while there are two pointed sticks and a mirror in your mouth. But when you’re operating in second and third language, silence is much more socially acceptable.

While it was fun to spend a few evenings out where restaurants are open later and movies play past midnight, we’re glad to be home. Every time I’m there, or any big city, I suddenly appreciate that most of the town of Mae Sot is closed by 8 or 9. I can appreciate the slow, quieter pace of this little place.

Yesterday was such a sweet day with the neighbor kids.

I biked to the market early–an obvious choice in this heat–and then was home cleaning, chopping vegetables to freeze, and cooking for the rest of the day. Since I was there for some time, I let the kids keep the basket of toys outside and play on the porch. They played happily through the morning, with different kids coming in spurts.

At one point, it was just little Yuh Meh Oo out there, who just loves to be near us. I played two games of cards with her, and then showed her I would leave the door open so that she could play and see me while I cleaned. I then continued to sweep the house while she so sweetly laid out all the little dolls and bears, rocked each one, whispered in their ears, and gave them a kiss goodnight.

I really love any time I have with Yuh Meh Oo. She is just such a sweetheart and is so gleeful when I give her my attention.

Later, I gave the kids some crayons and paper to color–their favorite–while I worked in the kitchen. Yuh Meh Oo, again preferring to be where I was, came around to our back door to sit on the step and color there. I opened the door for her, so that she could sit on the step and color on the floor of the kitchen.

And then fifteen more came around, and soon, they were oozing into the kitchen.

Sometimes, I know how important the boundaries are. But other times, it seems that breaking the boundaries speaks so loudly to them–they see us welcoming them into our lives, loving on them, and giving them special privileges.

…As I did this time.

I let them ooze into the kitchen and “color” while they looked around. They just sit on the floor and take it all in.

And then one little girl got brave and reached out to touch a magnet on the fridge.

It came off, and she looked surprised.

She went to put it back, clearly felt the pull of the magnet, and looked at me with wide eyes, letting out a gasp.

And before too long, I had about twelve little girls crowded around the fridge pulling our magnets on and off in awe.

It was so, so lovely. Because it really is the simple things.

One of the girls knew a little bit of English, and she asked about a photo on the fridge. It was of my friend Kim & I.  First they thought I was Kim, then they asked if it was my sister. When we finally got across that she was my friend, I pointed to the picture of Stephen’s family on the fridge. I showed them Stephen & I, then pointed out each sister, his mom, and his dad.

They LOVED it. And the loved all the babies, Laura & Leslie!  They would point to the kids and say, “Sister baby?”

And then they asked about my family, so I showed them a photo and again pointed out each sister and my parents. They loved this, too. And couldn’t believe you have four kids, Janel. We counted them three times.

Before too long I had to go meet a friend and told them it was time to go. But I loved it–I loved showing off our families, and I loved explaining a piece of our lives to them.

One girl said very clearly as she walked out the door, “I am happy. Thank you, teacher.”

My thoughts exactly.